July’s Purposeful Pursuit

Although it is Thursday (you’re almost to the weekend!) I wanted to start a new monthly series called “Purposeful Pursuit” where I share on both this blog as well as on social media my main focus for that month.

If you know me, you know I tend to have a lot of thoughts happening in my mind all the time. While I work on how to identify the purposeful and exciting thoughts from those that are meant to be in the background, I figured this series would be a good starting point for me (& hopefully can be for you) to really put a nail in what is most important in the present moment.

All day I’ve been thinking about business ideas and blog post topics and content for social media and I realize just how many ideas and concepts I really care about, and thus want to share with you. These range from all things health & wellness to following your dreams to the importance of community and storytelling and much much more.

As you can imagine, there are a lot of elements to pick through and consider from that list alone, so I wanted to start here, right now, with this purposeful pursuit. For this month I have chosen two:

• Rest

• Playfulness

Now I know you’re probably thinking “wait, aren’t those kinda the opposite?” and although I considered the same thing too, the answer would be no! These two things can coexist in your life just like so many other characteristics and skills that make you who you are. Let me explain why I’ve chosen these two for this week.

Rest

I want to start off by saying that last week I was on a roadtrip in a campervan with my boyfriend and two close friends bopping around on the west coast. When I got home I wanted to unpack and get my life back in order and start my routines back up that I had slightly lost during this time. However, my body was begging me to slow down and rest.

One element you will hear me discuss when it comes to health is the importance of listening to your body. It has all the answers if you are willing to listen. So for my people pleasers out there, or for the antsy non-stop doers, or for the perfectionists, please take a moment and think about this.

Who are you afraid will be disappointed if you relax? What are you afraid will happen if you do? Why do you believe you feel this way?

The honest truth for most of us is that we are afraid that we will be disappointed in ourselves if we relax. We are afraid we will look back on our day and wish we had done more, done more for ourselves or for others or for the world. We are afraid that this will make us smaller or less significant or less successful. We are afraid that others will notice and will cast judgment or no longer need us anymore. The hardest part about this process is accepting that almost all of us who struggle to rest have convinced ourselves either consciously or subconsciously that our worth depends on us continuing at this pace.

Here’s my mental narrative. “You just got back from your trip and your house is a mess, your routine is a mess, your hair is a mess, your life is a mess. No one else will fix it but you and the more time you spend not being productive and getting sh*t done is the more time you will sit here and feel guilty. If you don’t unpack your bags and vacuum the floor and put the dishes away and post your photos on Instagram and go get groceries and do a coaching module and write a blog post you are lazy.”

I will be the first one to acknowledge that this thinking, or anything even close to similar, is not fun. It sucks! Most of us (especially women) were raised in an environment where just sitting around was considered lazy and that at the end of the day all those responsibilities would still be there for us. So we never know when to stop. However, when we do, we tend to be in pain, either emotionally or physically or oftentimes both.

It’s because we aren’t listening to our bodies (or delegating anything to anyone else!)

So my focus for this month is being unapologetic when it comes to rest, and when I commit to it, not feeling guilty or thinking of all the other things I could be doing instead. There will be blog posts to come on the importance of rest, but here are some ways our holistic health benefits from rest.

• Physical health: our hormones and blood sugar rebalance, our energy levels increase, our cells, organs, and tissues repair, and our immune system regulates

• Mental health: we experience reduced stress, our productivity improves, our creativity spikes, and our decision-making skills sharpen

• Emotional health: our emotions stabilize, our mood boosts, our perspective changes, and our patience and empathy heighten

• Spiritual health: our interactions provide more pleasure, our connection simplifies, all relationships deepen, and a space for self-care opens

Sounds pretty great, right?

Playfulness

This one is important in a different way, especially to my current state as a human. Transparently, I’ve always struggled to play, even as a child. Growing up as a (mostly) only child I wanted to talk to the adults about adult things, ask questions about the world and about people, and try to be bossy and lead the crowd. I grew up faster than most and looking back realize that a lot of my “productivity” mindset and lack of playfulness really was rooted early.

One thing I want to make more space for in my life, and especially in my relationships, is fun and playfulness. Back to the people pleaser comment from above, sometimes it’s hard to tap into true playfulness and our own authenticity out of fear of others judgment or of doing so alone. However, there is nothing like dancing in some random gas station or singing a great song at the top of your lungs with your head out the window like no one else is watching.

So, here are some ideas for bringing more playfulness into your life:

• Doing things your younger self enjoyed. For me, that’s coloring, cartwheels in the grass, running around outside, dancing weirdly and loudly, making funny faces, and writing with chalk on the pavement.

• Reading children’s books. Bonus points if YOU loved that book.

• Go on a playdate. Maybe consider treating yourself to a meal or snack you would’ve enjoyed when you were a child. If the weather’s nice, lay down and spend some time looking up at the sky and imagine each cloud as a character.

• Be in nature. Bonus points if you frolick or sing and dance or climb trees.

• Reconnect with a childhood friend. It might feel weird if you haven’t spoken in years, but imagine they reach out to you. How would that make you feel?

• Write a letter to your younger self. What can you say to reassure them that they’ll make it through the stormy parts of their journey? What would that version of you have wanted to hear that you didn’t?

• Be silly and weird and 100% yourself in full color.

You can make your life look however you want it to look, always remember that. For me and this July 2023 era, I am focusing most on relaxation when my body needs it (especially on not feeling guilty) and being more playful. What are you focused on right now?